Busy

The past week has been pretty hetic. Saturday was the christianing, which was for want of a better word, amazing. Just very lovely and sweet. It's nice having the family together (bar the ones in england who weren't there). It was also lovely see Connor with Kayne, I havn't seen them together since Kayne was born. So to see Connor dote over his little brother was just very sweet and also re-assured me that Kayne does have a pretty decent set of godparents who worship him hehe. I was shattered by the end of the day though so Sunday came as a very welcome relief. I didn't get dressed all day. It was great. I sat in front of the fire. Friends and family called in to say hi and generally be very lovely. But bar that I done very, very little. Actually I did. I ate. Alot. It was brillent. So I had a very lovely birthday just chilling and seeing all the people I love. Monday and Tuesday however were a huge disaster. Apparntly my lungs had decided that they had been good for long enough and now was pay back. I was quite fine with that actually. I just slept for most of them. Very bad point though, my previously appetite of a horse, has now been reduced to that of a mouse. Rather annoying but hey. Anyways back at school on Wednesday, and I have managed to achieve a new record for me this year. 3 full days in a row where I havn't been off or be sent home. So proud of that fact. It was mostly due to my friends being as per usual amazing, at least one of them left their class early to come fetch me, carry my oxygen and if I needed, push me in the school wheelchair. My teachers also insisted I didn't take notes and photocopied them all for me. I was told no homework, and threatneded by Mr L that if I done any we would lose our party today. So I done very little. I am so grateful for having such amazing friends and teachers and people around me that make things that bit easier. Without them I know I couldn't do this without them. But even after all that I was shattered. School now seems to take alot more out of me. I'm not sure why but it does. My school and parents both agree that maybe I should take a while out and see if my health improves. I see where they are coming from but I am determined not to. I will stay in school, I will finish school, and I WILL go to university at the same time as my friends. CF will not stop me being a normal teenager.

Thats another thing. As of Sunday I am no longer a child. I mean 16 can still be called a kid, you are still young and innocent and stuff. But 17. No that's almost 20, coming out the end of the teenage years. I now need to find a new excuse for my tantrums hehe. But thinking about it, it seems to have gone in a flash. It seems like yesterday I sat my 11+, moved to Thornhill, and most of all it doesn't seem like a year ago I got my car. I still feel like I'm really young. I know 17 is young, but in relative terms here. Compare 13 to 17. Big difference, yet I havn't noticed it. Time has flew by so incredibly fast. It feels like I have blinked and I missed it somehow. I sat on Wednesday with Kayne in my arms, just remembering things from weeks, months and years ago. It was lovely. It also made me rather sad. I still havn't come to terms with not being a child anymore. I like the security of it. I like not having to do anything. I don't like having to grow up. Dam it has it's plus points, very big ones, but it also feels like I'm losing alot. I had he most amazing childhood. I guess I'm just sad that I'm in the last stage of it now.

Moving on as I'm getting rather emotional now. I blame that on the steroids but hey. I am going to spend the weekend with Cris. I am so excited. We plan to eat Ben and Jerry's. Apparntly he has worked out games and bribes for me to eat. I am scared now hehe. We will most likely spend most of it in front of Warcraft or being stupid. I like the time we spend together. We seem to have those conversations that make everything OK, make it all seem worthwile, in the middle of the night while, last time making pizza from scratch. It's one of the reasons I love him so much. Our realtinship can be so easy and free. We can discuss things from monkeys liking bannannas to death and his current favourite, transplants, even while making pizza. Its amazing. So I am now in the packing stage. I hate packing and I know that when I get there he will ask me why the hell I need 3 pairs of shoes for two days but I don't care.
Anyways I'm going to finish packing.
love nad cuddles
Neesh
xx